what will i do now?

i have worked for county seat and sold jeans and clothes.  i have worked at media play and sold books.  i have worked at stienmart and sold shoes (the worst job i personally have ever had!).  i have taught 9th and 6th graders English, and 7th, 8th, and 9th graders drama.  as of right now, i am an assistant p.e. teacher, but what now?    

i did not get the 5th grade teaching position at centennial elementary.  i am quite sad, but more than that i feel lost.  i am wondering if maybe God has a new direction for my life.  all the teaching jobs that have come my way have also, without pause, gone straight past me.  the high school assistant drama director, the jr. high English teacher, and now the 5th grade English teacher positions have all come and gone, so where does that leave me?  

i am now going to have to re-think my direction in life.  maybe God is pointing me in a new direction.  one that i have not thought of.  but if i have not thought of it, how am i going to think of it now?  i am going to have to open my mind to God and see what he shows me.  i know that he is really showing me, how i need to rely on him for things.  i keep thinking that i have the power to make things happen, when i have no power at all.   it is in God's hands, and i am going to put my faith in him and his plan for me, doing whatever wherever that is.  

the journey that is ahead of me is one that i have no idea where it will lead, but i am going to try to relax and enjoy it knowing that God is in control.  pray for me on my new and interesting journey!    

i will leave you with words from willie nelson that i feel best describe my feelings - "on the road again, i just can't wait to get on the road again."

what lies ahead . . .

is both exciting and daunting.  we have kept a human being alive for one year, and only the rest of his life to go.  it has been an amazing first year with so many ups, downs and side to sides i can not count them.  liam is now one.  my babydepot bulletin said "welcome to toddlerhood!"  although he is not actually toddling yet, he is well on his way.  he looks so big now, and is moving around so much, we are amazed by him each day.  the facial expressions and noises he makes could not be cuter.  we get the occasional "momma" and "dadda" and of course those are the best words to hear, ever!

it so funny to me, how much and how little we know about raising kids.  i can read and read and read and read and read about what to do in situations and then the situation is upon me, and i forget it all and just simply do what i feel.  of course it doesn't always work, but parenting is learning, and i love to learn.  so matthew and i will learn as we go.  

the next several years are going to be one wild ride and hopefully a crazy fun time as well.  

we'll keep you posted.

i can not believe it . . .

liam is one!!!!